Best Friends

In this world that we live in, everybody and anybody can say that they've been betrayed by another human being in some way, shape, form or fashion. I'll tell you what won't ever betray you, as long as you feed it, and I'm not talking about kids because they will betray you in a second under the right circumstances, is a cat.

Cats are independent, loving, affectionate, and supernatural. They warn you when there's ghostly bullshit going on in your house. Dogs are hip to the ghostly shit too but they will start whining like a bitch, running behind their master while his master is behind the curtain.

Cats have healing powers. People might think that's bullshit but NASA has about 600 cats in one room so that they can harness the powers of their purring. It's scientifically proven that a cat purrs at a frequency that heals bones. I bet Fido can't do that shit.

Some people are put off by cats because cats are moody. They show you love when they feel like it. When they don't feel like it, they want you to leave them the fuck alone. It's kind of like how people are. The one thing I know my cats won't do, is try to hurt or betray me.

You can have a marriage of fifty years. If you betray your spouse in any way, shape or form they become your bitter enemy. Cats will love you forever. All you have to do is feed them and clean their litter box.

So if you're feeling lonely and want someone to trust, talk to, snuggle up to, listen to you without interrupting and just bring out the good in you, go get two cats. If you just get one, the love will be overwhelming, if you're not used to it and the cat's will entertain each other when you're not there. Over time, you will realize that those cats are your best friends.


Ghetto Bastard: A Memoir (Volume 1) and Ghetto Bastard 2 (Volume 2) by Russell Vann.

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